


Help Me Forget

by egosoffire



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Grief, Grief Sex, Grief/Mourning, IW SPECULATION, JUST MY SPECULATING, no spoilers here, sad sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-17
Updated: 2018-04-17
Packaged: 2019-04-24 00:38:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14344299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/egosoffire/pseuds/egosoffire
Summary: Tony begs Loki to help him forget.THIS IS JUST IW SPECULATION. No spoilers.





	Help Me Forget

“Help me forget.”

The words were just so broken, so  _ shattered  _ that they caught Loki off guard. His life had changed so immensely since Thanos, and yet he knew he wasn’t the only one destroyed. Several of Stark’s friends were dead, and the trauma was too much for his mortal mind to wrap around. The desperate plea was a response to Loki’s request that Anthony not choose to drink himself to death.

“How?” he asked. 

"Aren't you supposed to be all powerful, or some shit like that?" Tony asked, looking into his eyes. The anguish that swirled behind Tony's dull eyes was the worst kind of pain. "Can't you erase my brain or something? Make it go away?"

"I wish I could," Loki replied, and found that he really did wish that. Tony had seen so much death, so much loss and he blamed himself. Loki knew exactly how it felt. "The effects would be far worse than the pain you're in right now."

Tony laughed from over the rim of his glass. "I highly doubt that."

Loki sat down next to the mortal. He didn't know how to deal with any of this -- emotions, feelings, they were all so foreign to him. He had always done a very good job at repressing them. He touched Tony's shoulder lightly. Tony flinched, but did not push him away.

"I can try and make you forget in another way," he said softly. It probably wasn't what Tony needed, but it couldn't make things much worse. 

"How?"

Loki took a breath and then pressed his lips to the human’s, firmly and with intent. Humans were so slow sometimes, but Tony Stark was not one of them and would understand right away. He pressed his hand firmly to the mortal's cheek. "Like that."

"Why?" Tony asked, his words harsh. 

"Why what?"

"Why would you want to do this with me?" Tony asked, the words coming out with a slight tremor of fear. He didn't seem much like a man who gave into fear, but Loki could tell that he was afraid. "What do you get out of it?"

"I'm lonely too," he whispered. "My brother was grievously wounded in the battle against Thanos -- my fault, I might add, and is in a lengthy recovery. Anyone with sympathies towards me is dead... I am alone, and I want to feel better myself. I also want better for you than a future where you drink yourself to death."

"Future?" Tony asked, the word coming out strained. "What kind of future can there be left for us?"

Loki brushed his fingers over Tony’s face, stroking his cheek reverently. “You’re an incredible man,” he said honestly. “Far too long I downplayed the brilliance that existed in your people, because I didn’t understand it. There is a future. You are needed. Maybe not in the same capacity that you once were, but there are people out there who love you and look to you…”

“Who?”

“The spider child, for one,” Loki said. “Also, the dear departed captain’s friend, the sad one. He needs some guidance now… guidance only someone like you can give.”

“I don’t want to guide anyone. I just want to…”

“I know.” Loki’s words were firm. “I know, because I do too. Now let me help you forget.” 

The words were desperate and sealed with a kiss. Their lips touched and everything felt right for a split second. 

“Come to my quarters with me,” Loki said. He took Tony by the hand and helped him to his feet. Tony swayed a bit, and Loki contemplated how much free will he had in this matter. It was just...it was worth it, regardless. “It will be more private than yours.”

Neither man spoke a single word as they headed up to Loki’s room. Loki unlocked the door and hastily waved a hand, dismissing some of the mess. He wasn’t exactly good at picking up after himself. He took Tony to the bed and pushed him down, gently.

Carefully, Loki climbed up on top of Tony, straddling his hips with caution. Tony had been very violent with the doctors who tried to help, but he had suffered several ill effects of the battle with Thanos and Loki knew there was pain. He had injuries that were unhealed. Loki could sense pain and he didn’t want to make it worse.

He leaned down and caught Tony’s lips in a heated, passionate, kiss that was almost forceful. Loki did not want to hurt him, but he wanted to take away the pain. He wanted to make things better.

He stripped off Anthony's clothing carefully. He wanted to make sure that each movement, each action was deliberate and that the beautiful mortal had a chance to back out whenever he felt that urge. He stripped off his shirt, and then inhaled at the sight.

Each layer of clothing stripped off showed scars, deep wounds that were not half as deep as the ones inside. 

Loki stripped off his own outer layers as well. He had healed from the physical wounds with barely a reminder, but he kept the scars buried deep inside. The scars inside were the constant reminder that try as he might, he would never go home.

“I’m sorry,” Tony whispered, seeing the look in his eyes.

“Me too.”

Carefully, they spent their time kissing. Tony’s lips were soft, delicate and yet his unshaven face led to a rough, scratching friction. Loki liked it. The kissing escalated and Loki used skills perfected over hundreds of years to blank out Anthony’s mind, to make him forget as best as he could.

He pulled back after several long, languid moments of kissing. 

“Anthony?”

“Yeah…” Tony whispered, the sound of a man with very little voice.

“Do you want more than this? Do you want to sleep together?”

Tony nodded.

“Do you want me on top?”

Loki was not the most accustomed to being a dominant partner in his relationships, but it seemed like what Tony needed, and this was all about his beautiful Midgardian lover.

He made quick but cautious work of preparing the mortal, using a healthy dose of magic and an equal dose of lubricant. He was not going to hurt Tony in any way, be it physical or mental. There had been too much darkness and far too much pain.

“I’m good. Please.”

He took the man slow, face to face, with Tony’s legs wrapped around his torso. He knew the eye contact was difficult, but at the same time he felt it bridged that connection, made them what they needed to be. He kept Tony’s eyes until he was all the way inside of him. That was when Tony’s eyes slipped shut.

It seemed a moment that everything stood still; it was like he wasn’t breathing.

“Tony, dear, I need you to breathe,” Loki said, as he stilled, hands on the mortal’s hips. “I can’t move until I’m sure you’re okay.”

The beautiful thing let out an obedient breath. 

With that breath, Loki was a little more sure he’d be okay. Then, Loki allowed himself a chance to move, gentle but firm, keeping that steady pressure on Tony’s hips while he drove in and out of him. 

Sex, intimacy, it was old news for the Asgardian prince. He had many lovers, who were of any gender imaginable. He had been a good lover to most of them, although he would admit to a few affairs where he had been selfish. This affair, however, was anything but. He touched Tony reverently, like he was the most precious bring alive. 

Tony seemed to just fall into his arms, clinging to Loki with both arms and legs. He breathed heavily, eyes shutting as he pressed his face into Loki’s shoulder and just rocked with it.

“Good boy,” Loki whispered softly against the top of his head. He reached down with a cool, gentle touch to stroke the man’s length, a gentle up and down stroke. “You can let go. Just let go of it all.”

The mortal did his part and listened to Loki. When he finally let go, his entire body spasmed and then went lax. He was panting, nearly crying and letting go of so much strain.

Somewhere in the bliss following the release, Tony passed out. Loki realized, somberly, that this was probably the only sleep the poor mortal had in weeks. He cleaned him up, with a healthy dose of magic to assist him. Then, he pulled the blankets over the fragile mortal body.

“I wish I could make you forget forever.”


End file.
